Mummy Loneliness
The first time you become a mother can be an exhilarating experience. One of the last things most mums expect to feel though, is a sense of loneliness. Read here how to handle this period.
It may seem odd to think that spending time bonding with your baby may also make you feel a lot of fear and doubt, as well as disconnected from other parts of your life.
You must understand that this phenomenon is quite common and that you are not the only mum who experiences loneliness. There is no need to panic because though you might feel overwhelmed it does not last for long.
What you need is a sense of how to handle this period, so you come out stronger.
Handling the Loneliness
Just like postpartum depression or the baby blues, this feeling of loneliness may be dangerous in the long term if not paid attention to. Mummy loneliness has been linked to mental illness, as well as hypertension.
To help you handle this, here are a few simple tips you can use:
1. Make friends with other mums
The old saying, there is strength in numbers, is true. Spending time with other mums gives you the opportunity to share your experiences with each other, exchange ideas and basically just have other mums to talk to. It can be calming to be with someone who understands exactly what you are going through. Joining mum groups is also great idea though it can be difficult to participate when you are consistently exhausted, and sleep deprived.
2. Go for a walk
Occasionally stepping out of the house for a breath of fresh air and stretching those legs can do wonders for your mood. It doesn’t have to be for long periods of time. A few minutes around the neighbourhood can sometimes do the trick.
3. Take a shower
It’s very easy to get so overwhelmed and not take care of yourself. Popping into the shower and having the water run over you can have a soothing and calming effect.
4. Call someone
You can keep in touch with your non-mum friends to help take your mind off the stress of motherhood. Just chatting about everyday life and other issues is a great way to help ease your stress.
5. Don’t turn down assistance
It’s tempting for some mums to feel they can manage everything on their own. However, there’s nothing wrong with asking for help from your partner, or friends and family. Most often they are willing to support you. Knowing they have got your back can ease some of the stress and loneliness you might be feeling.
6. Open up and be honest
You don’t have to bottle up your feelings. If you are upset, say it. If you’re tired or overwhelmed, tell someone. It’s ok not to be ok. If you think things don’t seem right with you in any way open up to your partner, friend and family as well as your doctor and let them know. After all, a problem shared is a problem half solved.
7. Write your feelings
You may consider blogging or writing out your feelings. It doesn’t necessarily have to be focused on your experiences as a mother. As long as you are writing about any subject, this can take your mind off things and offer an avenue to redirect your lonely feeling.
8. Don’t aim for perfection
It’s easy to compare yourself with the “perfect mums” you see particularly on social media. Their hair always seems to be in place, they look like they have their life together and you wonder what you might be doing wrong.
What you must understand is that these are just images of moments in their life. They are every bit as imperfect as you are. That’s why having mum friends can put things in proper perspective. You see the struggles they also go through, and you feel that you are not the only one experiencing this. Remember, there’s no such thing as a perfect mum.
9. Give yourself a break
You need to be more accepting of who you are. Remind yourself that you are doing a good job and that this period is only for a short while. Once you accept this and go with the flow, you will be able to better manage the situation.
Always remember that you are not alone in this and there are countless mums just like you who understand exactly how you feel. Keep reminding yourself that this is for a short time.
Of course, you can always seek help from your doctor or counsellor if you feel extremely overwhelmed and can’t seem to get out of a rut.
In the end, remember, you are not alone and there are more than enough allies waiting on the wings to offer you help.
-
0 -
0
-
0
-
0
-
0
Related articles
Exercising During Pregnancy : The Basics
Hooray for exercise! That’s right, it’s not off limits just because you’re pregnant, you just have to be very careful and make sure you talk to your doctor before you start.
4 mins to read
Pregnancy Week 31
As D-Day fast approaches, your little one is starting to turn upside down. What a clever baby! But you already knew that.
3 mins to read
Pregnancy Week 3
You’re at the very beginning of the journey. You can’t see anything yet, but that doesn’t mean there’s isn’t a whole lot going on.
2 mins to read
Pregnancy week 17
Your little one now weighs around 150g and is looking more and more like a “real” baby every day.
3 mins to read
Pregnancy Week 37
Your baby tends to keep his head down, arms crossed, and legs folded up on his chest as there’s not much room to move around. He’ll be very glad to get out and stretch!
3 mins to read
Mothers Diet doesn't need to be Double
Gaining the recommended amount of weight during pregnancy can help your baby’s development before birth and ensure a normal weight at birth and throughout childhood.
1 min to read
What to eat and avoid during pregnancy
You want to eat a healthy, well-balanced diet. You know it has benefits for both you and the baby growing in your belly. So how can you pick out which foods to eat during pregnancy?
7 mins to read
Week 23
Your baby is now 29cm long from head to toe and weighs considerably over 550g. You have got around 16 more weeks to go!
3 mins to read
Pregnancy week 10
You are already at week 10 of your pregnancy. Still another 29 weeks to go before you get to meet your little love. Learn more about what’s going on this week.
3 mins to read
Pregnancy trimester 3
You are now officially in your third and final trimester - your baby is all about fast track development from here on out.
1 min to read
Pregnancy week 29
As you inch your way towards the finish line – you will be giving birth in about ten weeks! – your baby is still growing by leaps and bounds, even opening her eyes this week.
3 mins to read
Pregnancy week 30
Every day, your baby develops more, getting ready to make an entrance into the world in just under 10 weeks. Has it gone fast or is the time creeping by for you? Every mum feels it differently.
2 mins to read
Pregnancy week 4
Almost one month already! There are lots of things happening inside you this week.
3 mins to read
Pregnancy week 16
If you could see inside yourself and watch your growing baby, you would see him sucking his thumb!
3 mins to read
Pregnancy week 36
From now until she makes her grand entrance, your baby will continue to put on about a half a pound per week, or around 220 g. She is already 47 cm long and weighs 2.7 kg!
3 mins to read
Your weight curve at hand!
There are many things you can do to prepare for the delivery of a healthy baby.
1 min to read
Is today the day? Birth Plans & Labour Signs
Here’s an outline that starts with your third trimester, and takes you right through to your upcoming labour. You’ll start by seeing your doctor or midwife every other week.
4 mins to read
Pregnancy week 22
If you could look inside, you’d see your baby sucking her thumb, her sucking reflex practically perfected now. It’s nature’s way of getting her to breastfeed from birth.
3 mins to read
Pregnancy week 11
If you could look inside, you’d see thin little hairs developing on your baby’s eyebrows and above her lip. Don’t worry if you’re having a girl, they’re very fine!
3 mins to read
